Privacy Policy
Effective Date: Immediately, unfortunately.
D’s Nutz (“we,” “us,” “this website,” or “the raccoons”) respects your privacy in the same way we respect most things: minimally, cautiously, and without enthusiasm.
This Privacy Policy explains what information is (and is not) collected when you visit this site.
1. Information We Collect
Short answer: almost nothing.
Long answer:
D’s Nutz does not actively collect personal information.
We do not use:
Google Analytics
Google Tag Manager
Advertising pixels
Behavioral tracking tools
Third-party marketing scripts
We do not ask for:
Names
Email addresses
Wallet credentials
Private keys
Seed phrases
Social Security numbers
Your browser history
Your emotional availability
If you are seeing a form asking for any of the above, you are on the wrong website.
2. Automatically Collected Technical Data
Like most websites, limited technical data may exist at the infrastructure level due to how the internet works.
This may include:
IP addresses
Request timestamps
Error logs
This data is processed by our hosting provider as part of normal website operation.
We do not:
Actively access this data
Store it ourselves
Analyze it
Sell it
Monetize it
Know what to do with it
3. Cookies
This website does not intentionally set tracking cookies.
If cookies are present, they are limited to:
Essential site functionality provided by the hosting platform
Temporary technical necessities required for page rendering
No cookies are used for:
Advertising
Profiling
Cross-site tracking
If any raccoon attempts to introduce cookies, it will be stopped.
4. Hosting & Infrastructure
This website is hosted using third-party infrastructure.
The hose may process limited technical data as part of providing hosting services. This data is handled under their own privacy and security policies.
We do not control this process, and we do not receive personal data from it.
5. Blockchain Data
If you interact with blockchain networks, you do so publicly and at your own discretion.
Blockchain data is:
Public
Permanent
Not private
Not editable
Not reversible
We cannot alter, delete, obscure, or explain blockchain data for you.
6. Data Security
We take reasonable steps to keep this website functional and intact.
However:
No system is perfectly secure
This is a parody project
The raccoons have veto power
Please act accordingly.
7. Children
This website is not directed at children.
If you are a child reading this, please stop and go do something age-appropriate, such as asking too many questions or learning how time works.
8. Changes to This Policy
We may update this Privacy Policy at any time.
Updates may occur:
Without notice
Without explanation
Without consulting the raccoons
Continued use of the site constitutes acceptance of the updated policy.
9. Contact
If you have privacy concerns, you may attempt to contact us.
There is no guarantee:
Your message will be read
Understood
Answered
Not eaten by raccoons
Summary for Humans:
We don’t want your data.
We don’t need your data.
Please keep your data.
Managed operationally by three raccoons in a trench coat. Legally, this sentence means nothing.